


truth runs wild like a tear down a cheek

by orphan_account



Series: two blue hearts locked in our own minds [5]
Category: Produce 101 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, M/M, both very sad and very cute, it's sad in the beginning but dw it's a happy ending!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-20
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-11-16 11:51:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11252598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: samuel finds daehwi upset about comments written about him, so he tries to cheer daehwi up.





	truth runs wild like a tear down a cheek

samuel wouldn’t have noticed daehwi sitting alone in the practice room if it wasn’t for the music playing inside. he goes in to check who is still awake at three in the morning, when he sees daehwi sitting down at a corner with his head in between his knees. bangtan’s sangnamja is playing quite loud and samuel thought the older boy had fallen asleep in the practice room again. the younger boy steps in carefully and the glass door squeaks loudly when he pushes it further. the blond whips his head up hearing the sudden sound and that’s when samuel noticed daehwi’s puffy eyes and red nose. there are tear tracks down daewhi’s cheeks — it is obvious to samuel that the older boy has been crying.

 

the sight in strange to samuel, when daehwi has been nothing but strong, brave and cheerful since the first time they met. more often than not, it is daehwi who provide encouragement to him. before samuel could even get a word out daehwi has already wiped the fresh tears away from his cheeks and rubbed his puffy, wet eyes. the younger’s heart breaks when he sees daehwi try to flash him a smile but samuel knows daehwi isn’t happy because the grin does not reach his eyes.

 

“hyung, are you okay?” samuel says as he approaches daehwi closer.

 

hearing that daehwi sits up straighter and flashes samuel another smile. “yeah! why wouldn’t i be?” the older answers back over-enthusiastically. the other doesn’t buy it, he has seen daehwi at his happiest and this is definitely not it.

 

instead of asking daehwi even further samuel sits down next to daehwi, so close that their shoulders are pressed together and both of their backs against the practice room mirror. the younger doesn’t look at daehwi, doesn’t say a word. instead he lets the comfortable silence envelop them. samuel understand that daehwi would tell him when he is ready or if he wants to, what is important to samuel is that daehwi wouldn’t be alone when he is down. the older boy is staring at the floor while playing with the laces of his white sneakers, avoiding samuel’s eyes.

 

the song repeats three more times and only then did daehwi finally speaks, although his eyes are still casting dowards. “did you…” daehwi sniffles, “did you read the internet article about me?” he asks, finally turning to look at samuel.

 

the younger shakes his head. “i don’t think so.” samuel doesn’t make it a habit to search articles about him on the internet, in fear of reading something sour said about him. he sticks to reading comments left by his fans on instagram and twitter. the older is silent again but samuel could tell he is trying to say something so he waits. 

 

daehwi looks like he is about to cry again as he hands samuel his phone, the article he mentioned already shown on screen.

 

the words _‘daehwi gay’_ is the first thing that samuel sees. he looks back at daehwi all confused, unable to understand as to why his name would turn up like that in naver search. “is this real?”

 

daehwi could only nod, he doesn’t trust his own voice to speak out properly. his throat feels constricted and all he wants to do is just hide from everyone. he feels so exposed and thrown out of his comfort zone — he is utterly terrified. samuel watches the older boy nodding his head down, his body is trembling and he could hear soft sobs forming. “hyung… this doesn’t mean anything. by tomorrow the search will be gone, people would forget about this by next week i promise you.” the younger puts his arm around daehwi’s shoulders, giving him a hug. “i told you don’t search your name on the internet. people can be mean sometimes but you didn’t listen.” he isn’t being patronising. he knows how ugly the internet comments could be and seeing his fear of daehwi coming across them coming true, worries him.

 

“do you think it’s a bad thing, samuel?” he could barely hear daehwi’s soft, trembling voice. “being…” the older falls quiet again. the silence between them is heavy, samuel knows what daehwi meant but he waits. he waits for daehwi to say it himself, “…being— gay?”

 

“no.” samuel immediately answers. despite the quick reply daehwi could tell the boy isn’t careless with his answer. samuel means it. “of course not,” he hears the younger adds. samuel says it as if it is the most natural occurrence of the world, something that daehwi could only wish to hear from other people. slowly the older turns his head to look at samuel. he is absolutely terrified on how the younger boy would look at him. the comments upset him but his mind imagines samuel looking at him with utter disgust, loathe or fear and that terrifies him the most — the possibility of samuel not wanting to be by his side anymore.

 

his heart leaps and he feels like crying again — happy crying — when samuel looks at him the same way he always does. nothing has changed and daehwi has never felt more relieved. “you’re not…disgusted?” samuel couldn’t miss the way daehwi’s shaky eyes glances back to the comments on his phone screen.

 

samuel grabs the daehwi’s phone that is on the floor and shoves it inside his hoodie pocket. he looks back at daehwi like he had just said the most ridiculous thing. “people can love whoever they want,” he answers while staring intently back at daehwi’s own doe eyes.

 

daehwi doesn’t think that samuel gets it. he doesn’t think that samuel understands what this means. the words are at the tip of his tongue and he wants to say it. his mind starts reeling, trying to find the correct words to express to a point that he doesn’t realise he has been staring at samuel for awhile. his hands are shaking, he could feel his heart hammering against his ribcage that he could hear his heartbeat pulsing in his eardrums. “samuel, i don’t think you understand. i’m—”

 

the younger stops him before he could say anything further. “you don’t have to say it hyung. tell me again, only when you’re ready,” samuel says with a warm smile. “and when you do, just know that i’ll listen. and i’ll still be here,” he adds.

 

daehwi cries, he cries differently than before. he is sobbing loudly with his body shaking uncontrollably, unable to understand the feeling that is spreading fast inside him. he is so overwhelmed with happiness yet at the same time he feels heavy sadness still anchoring him down.

 

“ah, hyuuung why are you crying…!” samuel wraps his arms around daehwi and daehwi clings back to him, laughter seeping in between sobs. “i’m trying to cheer you up!” the younger adds.

 

“i’m not crying!!” daehwi shrieks back cutely with obvious tear tracks running down his cheeks and face flushing red from weeping. 

 

“mhm, sure.” samuel replies back smugly as he rubs his thumb across daehwi’s cheek to rid of a tear. 

 

daehwi slaps samuel’s hand away and huffs. “shut up,” daehwi mumbles, wiping his whole face with his sleeves.

 

 

* * *

 

 

as they walk back to their dorm room their hands naturally intertwine, finding comfort in the warmth in each other’s hands. “are you still upset?” samuel asks with a quiet voice when they are in front of their dorm room door. it’s almost four in the morning, and they usually have to wake up by seven and yet both boys don’t want to sleep. 

 

daehwi beams a smile — a genuine one this time — and shakes his head. 

 

“okay good.” samuel pauses for awhile, the boys are still holding hands. “hey hyung, do you wanna get a drink?” daehwi passes a questioning look. it suddenly dawns on samuel that it sounded like a come-on line. “i— i meant at the vending machine downstairs!” he quickly adds, feeling warmth seeping to his cheeks. he could _feel_ his face slowly turning red.

 

daehwi secretly finds amusement in the younger being flustered. “yeah! let’s go!” he answers with a smile. he doesn’t wait for samuel to reply back, instead the boy tugs the other’s hand and speedwalks towards the other end of the hallway and then turning right to the stairs leading to the dinner hall. 

 

the two stops right next to a vending machine near to a glass door leading to the practice rooms. “which one do you want?” daehwi immediately asks, his other hand — which is not holding samuel’s own — rummaging deep into his pocket for money. “strawberry again?” the older gives a knowing glance and grin.

 

“sure,” the younger mumbles shyly. he still feel warmth at the tips of his ears.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“you know if we’re in trouble for staying up late past curfew i’m telling all of them it’s your fault,” daehwi says teasingly as he sips his banana milk. “i honestly was planning on going to sleep.”

 

the two of them are now sitting on one of the tables in the dining hall, side by side.

 

samuel chuckles and takes the teasing good-heartedly, knowing that both of them are far from being tired for some odd reason. samuel could still feel the warmth of daehwi’s palm around his own hand. the edges of his skin tingling by being so close to daehwi this late, with just the two of them.

 

“doesn’t this remind you of something?” the older asks.

 

“hm?” samuel is quiet, thinking of what daehwi could mean. but nothing came up. he shrugs.

daehwi huffs. “when we first met! i bought you the same drink, remember?”

 

the memory finally clicked to samuel. _ah, right. first day filming at the studio._ “right… you were that weird hyung who followed me to the toilet,” samuel snickers and scrunches his nose to poke fun at the older.

 

daehwi rolls his eyes but still laughs. “i didn’t know you wanted to go to the toilet! i told you!”

 

samuel gazes at the older intently. “i’m glad we get to be friends hyung,” samuel suddenly confesses. “i was really scared of being alone here. since it’s a competition, and i’m the only one sent from my company.”

 

“you were worried for nothing!” daehwi lightly pushes his side against samuel. he falls quiet for a moment before speaking up. “i’m happy that you’re my friend too.” the youngerl turns to daehwi, who is already grinning happily at him. he couldn’t believe that almost an hour ago the older boy was bawling his eyes out. he smiles back.

 

 

it’s only when daehwi pulls back that samuel realised what the other boy did. 

 

daehwi kissed him on the cheek. 

 

daehwi.

 

on his cheek.

 

samuel blinks a couple of times, trying to comprehend what has happened. daehwi is staring back at him not confused but oberving, waiting, hoping — waiting for samuel to react, hoping that the other boy is taking it okay.

 

“i’m sorry,” daehwi splutters out regretfully when samuel stays quiet for far too long, doe eyes still as big as saucers and his lips gaped open. “i’m sorry i’m being weird—” the older reprimands himself for acting emotionally without thinking. _why did you do that,_ daehwi snaps at himself internally, _now samuel thinks you’re strange and wouldn’t be friends with you anymore._

 

“hyung,” samuel finally speaks up. he reaches his hand up to his cheek, which is growing extremely warm. “did you just k— kiss me?”

 

“i’m sorry!!” daehwi shrieks and buries his small face in his palms. “god, i am so stupid.” samuel hears daehwi’s muffled voice.

 

samuel, instead of saying anything, takes daehwi’s hands away from his face and puts them on his lap. the younger boy is now staring at daehwi intently that the older boy is growing uncomfortably shy. “w-what” daehwi mumbles, his eyes trying to avoid samuel's own gaze.

 

samuel ducks his head towards daehwi’s face and plants a chaste kiss back on daehwi’s cheek.

**Author's Note:**

> hello everyone!! first of all i want to thank you for all the kudos and taking time to leave kind comments <3 they really do mean a lot! secondly, as you all know (pd101 spoiler if u don't?) samuel didn't make it to the final lineup anddd i don't really see the point of continuing this;;; i really wanted to write an 8-part series but i don't think there is a point in doing it now;; (5 fics are pretty good though right?) however! i'm planning on writing one, one last time, but an AU! so anything outside of broduce. if you guys have any AUs in mind feel free to send them here https://curiouscat.me/dusermeg ~ i'm def making this a fluff fic just to end the series in a happy note ^_^ you can go as vague or as detailed as you want! i'll choose one (or mix in a few ideas) into one last fic!
> 
> lastly, a shameless plug but follow samuel on insta @bravepunxh and send loving comments on his way T__T he did so well and worked so hard;;;


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